By Basic Tart
Posted Friday, June 17th, 2016
Posted Friday, June 17th, 2016
FYI has a new show called Teenage Newlyweds. The secondhand embarrassment from this show is certain to be high!
Let’s recap Episode 1:
The intro tells us that most millennials are waiting to get married but those that decide to marry young “face the nation’s highest divorce rate”. Such optimism makes me certain that the network is very invested in the success of these marriages!
First we meet Halie and George. Halie is 18 and George is 21. They are Mormon and are getting married in Mesa, AZ. They met when he was a missionary but didn’t really talk because that’s not allowed on a mission. He went back to Utah and she invited him to dinner when she was there on vacation with her family. After spending two weeks together Halie told George she wanted to marry him and they pretty much said they are getting married because they want to have sex which isn’t allowed outside marriage in their religion.
Brenda is 19 and Travis is 20. They live in California and met in college. Travis’s roommate knew Brenda and set them up but Travis thought the friend Brenda was with was the cute one! She’s liberal and he’s conservative so they broke up but couldn’t stay away from each other. After dating for a year they got engaged. Because why continue dating, I guess. Oh wait, Travis will only have sex if they are married so they’re getting married! (I’m sensing a theme here.)
Our final couple is 19-year-old Emma and 21-year-old Joey from Oregon. They met in HS and got engaged when Emma turned 18. She wants to marry him because he makes her laugh and he wants to marry her because he doesn’t like anyone else. Sounds like a great foundation. And Emma’s mom looks THRILLED that her daughter is marrying Joey.
Back to George and Halie. Halie’s parents say they are young but they have the same principles and morals which is enough to keep their marriage together. Halie says she’s the middle of five girls and is super close with her sisters. She’s never lived away from her parents or family. So what better idea than to marry a guy she’s known for four months and move really far away from them all because they want to have sex? Halie’s parents start talking about her moving and how much they will miss her and her mom cries for the first time. Oh, good, they are already getting pressure to have babies (at least one girl!) and they are admitting they don’t really know each other since they have only spent two months “in each other’s actual presence”. Halie says she knows George “has really good taste in music” and George says he knows Halie “likes mac and cheese”. Those two things are more than enough to base a marriage on! Besides, they have time to get to know each other. I mean, why would you want to know the person you are marrying before you get married?
Travis is excited to marry Brenda so they can have their own place! I guess I didn’t know that you couldn’t live together in CA unless you were married! Travis says even though he’s conservative and she’s liberal his parents aren’t worried as long as Brenda “loves God”. Then we see Brenda and Travis discussing marriage equality. Not surprisingly Travis thinks marriage should be between a man and a woman and Brenda thinks people should marry who they want. As her sister says, “Their values are opposite.”
Emma is an only child, close to her parents and doesn’t like to be alone, I think all can be summed up as high-maintenance. Joey’s parents say they encouraged them to get premarital counseling but Joey and Emma didn’t want to. Why should they when they know everything? Joey makes a scene at their rehearsal lunch by drinking out of 16,000 straws and choking while Emma tells him to stop. He’s very mature. And again Emma’s mom (and also her dad) look super happy their daughter is marrying Joey. Emma’s parents are very concerned with how Joey will provide for their daughter since he admits he has no career aspirations.
Halie’s sister asks her how she feels about the wedding night and Halie says she’s “not too nervous” but George is and he “turns bright red whenever we talk about it”. Now we see George driving with his friend, Josh, talking about how neither of them knows anything about sex. George says the only person he’s talked to is another friend, Jordan, who is also getting married and has never had sex either. Luckily Tammy (Jordan’s fiancee? They don’t really clarify who Tammy is.) has read books “like about parts”. Josh says he’s heard the first time is a letdown and George says he’s heard “sometimes they cry because it’s not what they are expecting”. The only discussions he’s had with his parents are that it’s sacred but not about what it is or how it works, but “It’ll be fine!”. The whole scene is awkward and makes me sad for them since they don’t know anything about sex but they are getting married so they can have it.
Oh, good! Joey and Emma are writing their own vows! Joey admits he wanted to wing it but Emma made him write them down. Their friends are “helping” and Emma doesn’t like any of their suggestions while Joey’s friends are asking him questions that are too difficult for him to answer.
Back to Travis and Brenda. They drive by an abortion protest. Brenda says she would have an abortion if she got pregnant by rape and Travis says he’d want her to have the child. Brenda says they’ll get divorced if that happens. Probably not good to be looking for reasons to get a divorce the day before you get married.
Wedding Day! Halie’s mom is crying as they pull up to the temple (we will have a cry count for her from now on). George comes running out to meet them. Now we meet Adam, George’s older brother. He quit going to church and drinks, smokes and has premarital sex. Wait, what? Why is George talking to his friend who hasn’t had sex about having sex when he could just talk to his brother who has actually had sex?! Adam and cameras are not allowed in the temple for the ceremony. Adam seems a little bummed because he would have liked to see a temple marriage but, ”that’s not going to happen”.
Emma and Joey do a first look and it’s very sweet. Emma says Joey makes her feel loved like no one else ever has and that’s “really, truly special”. But we need to remember she never dated anyone before Joey so of course no one has made her feel like he does. There’s no one to compare him to! Time to stop taking pictures because they’ve lost the marriage license! The pastor doesn’t have it, Emma’s parents don’t have it, who has it? Thankfully they found it in Joey’s car at his parent’s house, but somehow Joey is blaming Emma for forgetting it. Their ceremony is nice. After they kiss, he throws her over his shoulder and runs up the aisle cave-man style.
Brenda gets ready for the wedding with her family and Travis’s sister and sister-in-law. Travis is driving to the wedding with some friends. Their advice is not to become an old, married couple. Travis says they have to keep it “exciting and new all the time or it’s gonna suck”. I can’t wait to see them in six months when they have a normal routine and things aren’t so new and exciting anymore.
George and Halie emerge from the temple to cheers, they are married! They take some group pictures outside the temple and we find out that Adam has been married twice and has two kids. He’s currently getting a divorce and says he, “hopes with all his heart to find something as strong as what they have.” Since Adam wasn’t allowed in the temple for that ceremony Halie and George are having a separate ring ceremony so he can be involved. Unfortunately, after they drive to the location of the ring ceremony and reception, Adam doesn’t show up. I liked Adam until he did this and I’d known him for all of ten minutes, the same amount of time our newlyweds have known each other!
Brenda has her mom walk her down the aisle since her dad died when she was young. They also write their own vows which are very sweet.
All three couples are now married! In Episode 2 we get the wedding night and honeymoons! But first my impressions of the couples:
- They are all very young and very naïve. They don’t seem to know how to communicate or deal with differences and think that because they are married their differences will just work out and be okay.
- Two of the couples admit getting married because they want to have sex and believe in waiting until marriage.
- They don’t seem to know each other all that well, even Emma and Joey who have been together for the longest amount of time, and don’t see how that could present any problems.
I’m interested in seeing the season go along to see if any of this changes and how they will deal with conflict.
About the Author:
Mini-van driving, coffee and wine drinking, sports loving, chocolate eating, work outside the home, cradle/cafeteria Catholic, pro-vax, married mom of three (including twins). I enjoy reading Harry Potter, romance novels, People magazine and true-crime. I live in the rural American heartland.
